Saturday, May 9, 2009

Pure Motherhood...

I am a mom. How exciting is that!?
What a blessing. What a joy. What heartache. What overwhelming emotions.

My life is a journey of pure motherhood right now. My story is consumed by 4 kids at this time. My life is consumed by mommy thoughts...
"how did that get there!?!", "Don't play in the toilet" , "Play nice or your not playing at all" You want me to give you something to cry about?" I am the mom and I said so" "wait till your dad gets home!" Don't bite, hit or kick your brother-sister!"

I spent the day with my mom yesterday. Took her to get her haircut. 16 inches of hair cut off !! she also got it colored. I love my mom. Yes, growing up was very hard. I was the oldest. I had to protect her. I had to help her. I had to take care of her. She did the best she could and I love her for that and admire her deeply now that I am a mom. One thing ( I have many things)I love about my mom is she never put herself first. She never really thought she was worth it. She had to work 3 jobs to put food on the table. She had 3 kids at home, all 10 months apart. She lost a baby after me, I have watched her struggle with the grief. Something I can not relate to. It has taken me years to understand she did do her best...and that is why I love her. She never gave up and I am sure there where times she wanted to.

I love when she is over here. She still gives me advice all day long. Some I just nod and smile at and other times I listen. She still parents me.... and that is okay. One day I will only have the memories of her on Mother's day...and all her advice.

* Your giving Carter to big of bites.
* You need to water your flowers
* fold your laundry this way and you can fit more in the drawer
* Your being to hard on Matthew
* I wouldn't change that color
* you need to keep her in a time out..don't give in!
* don't worry
* If you mop your floors at night it will be easier then now.
* I made you come home right after school

I wouldn't change any of this for anything....

I have been following this families story...It will make you cry and melt your heart.

Happy Mother's day.

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