Friday, March 27, 2009


Being a step parent has to be hard job...Now I am not step-parent ( where did they every get that from? I hate it) and I am not an official foster mom but right now i have a young man in my house who is not my biological child. I love him. I worry about him. I care for him. But he is not my child. He is has not been with me since birth. He has not laid his newborn head on my chest seconds after birth. I care tremendously about his welfare. I feel torn. I feel lost. I feel like I am not sure if this is the best thing for me. This is wearing me out. This is a huge challenge. I have always wanted to be foster a teenager? not so sure.

Drugs. Sex. friends. Everything seems to moving full speed ahead and I am not ready for Matthew to arrive to the temptations. I am a not ready for all of this. How DO I do this?

When your parenting another child why is so wrong to admit that you have a different kind of love for them? Why are people so quiet about the struggles of this dynamic parenting? I am finding that I keep hitting a road block when it comes to seeking advice or counsel on how to go about all of this?

You may not be the parent but you are here. You are holding their hand when they are scared, You are bringing them to the doctor and the dentist. You are folding their laundry. You are coaching them everyday on the right thing to say and do....and yet you are not their parent.Plain and simple. SO when it gets tough do you walk away? Should I walk away? Should I throw my hands up in despair and call it quits? Have we impacted his life? Will we make a difference? How many of you have been foster parents?

I look back over the last 9 months..He has grown closer to God...He has been baptised.. He passed a few classes...but the he has also given us run for our money with a few run ins with the Law.
Someone Said to me yesterday that when your doing Gods work..he will take care of you and your other children. He calls us to take care of the my will Gods will?

2 ...Stalker Comments:


Praying for you!


Hi Tiffiny,

I'd love to chat with you about this.

#1 I had a bio. son that had his run-ins with temptation and with the law. So, I've been there done that.

#2 I adopted a 12 year old, now 13. Legally, he is my son ... but it is not the same as the other ones that I raised for 12 years before they hit their teen years. It is different; and it is HARD. He has had 12 years of "other" influences. He doesn't know me as a loving mother that rocked him as a baby and has loved and nurtured him. No, I am a lady that suddenly appeared and said, "Call me mom." He was completely independent and in charge of his own life ... before coming to America. BIG change!

If you want to chat, just pick up the phone, or pop me an email. We can phone chat, email chat, or coffee date chat. You pick!

Laurel :)