Thursday, May 27, 2010

Now what am I going to do?

Okay, so I am fat.

I have battled my weight for years. I think I was born a size 10 and then added a size every year after that.

I have seen the stares. I have felt the discrimination but I was VERY VERY aware of my weight.

Now that I have lost 93 pounds over the last 2 years and am only 43 away from my goal I have heard more unfriendly comments now then ever before.

I have seen it with my husband who is down over 150 pounds.

Guys will come up to him and instead of saying you look great or I didn't recognize you ( these are both fine to say) they say things like " Oh Man you are skinny, I guess now I need to get smaller then you" " Dude, your like the thin one now"

I am sure they don't mean anything by it and are happy to see Jeremy's transformation but things like that hurt. People are basically saying that

* you are to be the fat one our whole life

* you are not worthy of being smaller then me

I get this one...

Your going to be skinner then me now what am I going to do?

I have gotten this from 2 or 3 different people and I want to say....

Well You can go on a diet.

You can keep your mouth shut.


Say I look good...build me up.

I have never been one to let myself get so insecure about how I look. Yes, there are things that I don't like or wish I could change but I still put on a swimsuit , I still try to look good everyday.

I always wondered how people could get so insecure or overly sensitive to others around them trying to lose weight and make a lifestyle change. If you are that insecure and feel like your life is over because we are changing our life PLEASE don't say anything at all....

Can't you just be proud of them?

4 ...Stalker Comments:

Tiff

I have always thought you were very stylish, every time I see you you look incredible, your hair is awesome and your clothes look fabulous. You know how to accessorize and pull together an outfit so well, I have always wanted to be stylish like that, but can never quite pull it off.

Ignore those people who say mean things. It's just their own insecurities talking. You look great, that's all that matters!

our sweet life

ok~where do i start?!! ;)
first~i've never seen you in person but i can see you're beautiful inside so...
second~whoever is saying this is, well, stupid. have you ever seen a kid try to snuggle up to a skinny mom? i always feel sorry for him...who wants to lay his head on a bony shoulder??!!!!
thirdly (a word? i think not ;))~i think EVERY woman has things about herself that they hate (thanks for the hips, grandma!) but my husband loves me and thinks i'm sexy so, seriously, what else is there? sure, i'd love to be a size 6 but my BONES aren't even a size 6!!! and my kids love me because i talk to them...with or without my size __ butt ;)
hang in there...and loose all the negative friends!!

Heather D

People say stuff like that because they are insecure and stupid.

Seriously.

And? You do look great, own it!

The best one I've heard? 'I'm so glad you're losing weight. You were so beautiful when you were thin.'

Oh yes. That's an insult wrapped as a compliment if I've ever heard one!

You're hot. People. Can. Suck. It.

Laurel

So sorry! So sad!

You were beautiful when I first met you 9 years ago. And, you're still beautiful. I have no idea when you have gained weight or lost weight. You're just a beautiful woman that goes to my church.

I NEED to lose 150#, so maybe I need to find out how you're doing it. But, I cannot imagine how painful those types of comments could be. Oh my! Do my friends just consider me their "fat friend"? Now you have me wondering.

I was with some 80 year old friends last weekend. The woman said, "I was re-doing some photo albums and looking through our 1983 album. You were all so skinny then." Sad thing ... "you" meant me, my husband, her son, her daughter-in-law ... and it's me that is the "non-skinny" one now. My husband is still slim, her daughter-in-law is still slim, her son could use to lose a little, but ... I am definitely the "non-skinny" one. The comment hurt. Deeply. Is that all they see of me, after 30 years of friendship?

Laurel