Pain Pain go away...

Don't ever come back ANY DAY!

Olivia loves it when I walk her down the stairs at least 3 times a night. Her anxiety from being away from me is growing more and more apparent. I am hoping that it does not transfer over to kindergarten. I pray for her nightly that she will not have tummy aches or physical signs of anxiety.

I told her I could only walk or crawl to her one time and she needed to stay in bed. I explained to her that I will be needing another surgery and then I will get better.

She looked at me with tears in her eyes and said " you'll never be fixed".

That crushed me.

Her whole little life she has heard way to much on how mommy can't do this or that.

I fell very fortunate that I am home with them. Pain or no pain I wouldn't want them not here with me. No matter how bad my days get. No matter if they see me laying in bed for hours while the help is out in the kitchen or living room.

They have always given me a reason to get out of bed. Shower and put my best foot forward ( even if it is only my left foot ;) They are my sunshine on my worst days. They can fight all they want and sometimes it is just music to my ears. This will all be a distant memory.

Today I will find out the next step in the process of being "healed" or "fixed" what ever the heck you want to call it.

Seriously, it can go away.....

6 years is a long time to battle anything..